If I could think of a word that I want 2016 to be for me, it's fearless. Being a chronic worrier and over-thinker means I get scared easily. I'm rarely fearless. Sometimes it's being scared of really silly things and sometimes it's the fear of completely rational things. But being so fearful all of the time can hold you back in so many ways. So today I wanted to discuss my quest to be fearless in life and blogging.
WHAT IS FEAR?
an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm.
be afraid of (someone or something) as likely to be dangerous, painful, or harmful.
WHY SO FEARFUL?
We all have our fears in life, some are rational and some are completely irrational. But whatever they are when those fears affect our lives they become a problem. So here are some of my most rational fears;
- Not doing my best for those around me.
- Not making progress and becoming stagnant.
- Letting other people hold me back from achieving my goals.
- Having a negative effect on other peoples lives with no intention of doing so.
- Not being able to provide for myself.
And here are some of my more irrational fears;
- Orange peel.
- The bottom of boats.
- Finger nails being bent back.
- Space/oceans - basically the unknown.
HOW TO TACKLE THEM
Facing your fears is hard, there is no denying that. It takes a lot of courage and confidence to even get started on facing them. The best thing I've found is to deconstruct the fear, pick it apart and look at every aspect of why it's scary. Once you've torn apart those fears they somehow don't seem so monumental and you can plan how to break them down. Like anything starting small is important, being overwhelmed makes fear even worse sometimes.
FEAR CAN BE MOTIVATING
Sometimes that fear and feeling the adrenaline can push you so much, or it can do the exact opposite and hold you back. Something I've noticed is that fear comes in waves. Often it can feel incredibly motivating and get you going but then it can spiral to be uncontrollable. When you've faced something that scares you and overcome it then that can also become a motivation because you know if you've done it before then you can do it again.
don't GIVE OTHERS THE POWER TO SCARE YOU
When you let somebody scare you, you give them power. This is so important when it comes to the online world and blogging. Let's be honest, no-one wants to be disliked. But in reality, we can't all get along. But just because someone doesn't like you doesn't give them any right to scare you. People can become aggressive and it's intimidating to deal with. But never give people permission to scare you. Once you take that away from something or someone. It takes power that away from them which isn't theirs to have.
YOU CAN'T PLEASE EVERYONE
It's something that we all know and all try to live by but it's difficult. Living your life trying to please everyone else over yourself is never going to result in you being happy. It's exhausting being a people pleaser. No matter what you are or what you do, people will find something they don't like. And that's ok. We're humans and we don't come in a one type suits all shell.
WHAT'S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN?
Obviously, there are some restrictions to this rule. But more often that not we're so scared of things that will never end in something detrimental. Whenever you feel scared or worried about something, ask yourself. What's the worst that could happen? If the answer isn't something that could be harmful to yourself or others then go for it.