A matter that is incredibly close to my heart is body image, we live in a world that is obsessed with how other people look or whether somebody is too big or too small we just can't seem to help ourselves but to be critical. Whilst the topic of body image is a hard one to approach I want to open up a conversation about it, it is something I'm sure we all think about it on a daily basis so it's important to talk about it.
My relationship with my own body has been a really tricky one, for years and years I felt totally disconnected from my own body. Having body dysmorphia has played a huge part in the way that I look at myself, since a young age I've looked in the mirror and I've not been able to see what I really look like. It sounds strange and trying to explain it in words isn't something thats easy, I used to analyse the way that I looked in photographs because parts of my body looked completely different to the way that I saw them reflected in a mirror. In my teens is when I started to really get into a bad area, I went to see a psychiatrist and a dietician to try and get to the route cause of it and help but it ended up making the whole situation a whole lot worse.
Being told by other people that you should look a certain way is never going to result in a healthy body image for anybody. Years of being bullied about how I looked too thin, like a skeleton and that I obviously had anorexia ruined my confidence, my build is naturally small I have petite features and that is something that I highly doubt will ever change. We are all built differently and no two people will ever look the same, regardless of the size stitched into a dress we all have different bodies. It's easy to forget that the thing that we should put before anything is what is going on inside, for years I didn't care what was going on in the inside my body and only thought about the exterior.
Something I promised to myself this year is that I would finally really try to get a positive relationship with my own body and the way I looked. For years I relied on other peoples validation of the way I looked, particularly in relationships and it was a dangerous and unhealthy cycle to be in. I'm really happy to be able to say I'm for the first time in years really happy with the way I look and feel, I'm at a healthy weight and BMI and finally seeing myself properly. Although I can't really change the current state of the inside of my body, that is something that medication has to take care of sadly I can change how I feel about it. Exercising has improved my confidence ten fold, taking control of my health was a big part of improving it. For the first time I feel like I'm the one who is in charge and I finally feel like I'm connected to my body.
Learning to stop caring what other people think in all aspects in my life has been so freeing but particularly with how much I weigh. Body shaming is strife at the moment, on both ends of the spectrum you get shamed for being too big or too small and it's wrong. Ultimately why should we be defined by the size we are? The whole 'real woman have curves' or 'woman should look like this' is just plain offensive and utter rubbish, a woman should look however she wants and feel amazing for it. We shouldn't condone making people feel good by making others feel bad for how they look. Just because I'm a size 6 doesn't mean I'm any less of a woman than someone who is a size 26 and it is sad that people only seem to class woman over a certain size 'real'. No matter what shape your body is it's real and everybody should feel proud of how they look as we're all equal in this world. I don't need other people to tell me how they think I should look, it's got nothing to do with them and the only person my image matters to is me and if I'm happy and healthy then everything is a-okay.
What are your thoughts on body image?