Everything Awesome From The Past 10 Years
It didn’t dawn on me until a few weeks ago that we’re entering a new decade in just a few weeks. As cliche as it is, I do love the feeling that a new year brings and I’m particularly excited to enter a new decade and everything that it can bring. I’ve been writing yearly review posts for quite a while now and they’re always something I get so much joy in. Like most, I don’t tend to take the time to appreciate what I’ve achieved so putting these posts together always gives me the chance to happily reflect on all the good things that have happened and this is everything wonderful that has happened in the last decade.
i completed my degree and got a first
Undeniably something that I’m insanely proud of myself for doing is getting a First Class degree. I didn’t start university in the best headspace, my mum had passed away after a nasty battle with cancer just a few weeks prior I was supposed to go. Whilst part of me wonders if I should have deferred and waited a year to somewhat heal from my mum passing away if I had then my life would have panned out completely differently. There were points in my degree where I truly didn’t think I was going to get through it, I didn’t have the motivation to carry on and very nearly left but then there was a lightbulb moment during a new module and it gave me the motivation I needed to carry on. I never did amazingly well at school as I could never hold it together in exams so to get a First class degree was a huge achievement for me. There are so many things I wish I could have done differently during my three-year degree but the outcome couldn’t have been any better.
i started from roses
This year marks my ninth year of blogging and I can safely say I never thought I would get to this point. Before From Roses, I had a photography blog and I also loved Tumblr, which is where I discovered the world of beauty blogging and I became obsessed. At the time I was struggling with where I wanted to go and discovering this entire world was life changing. I felt a passion ignite in me that I hadn’t felt in such a long time. When I first began From Roses it was all about beauty and shopping, granted I was still a pretty serious emotional shopper at the time but creating posts around the things that I’d purchased made the purchases even more exciting to me. Over the past nine years, the content has changed quite a lot, instead of being predominantly about beauty and the things that I was hoping to buy I cover a vast array of topics. Without a doubt the most rewarding posts I’ve shared have been the ones that I’ve been the most terrified to put out into the world so the posts all about my OCD, grieving the death of my mother, body confidence, self-love and worth, not being career-driven, female friendships, being a little bit of a loner and so many more.
I started to Understand my mental health
Getting to understand myself more as a human and finally understanding that I do struggle with various mental illnesses has been life-changing for me. Knowing that it’s not just me who feels this way either has been such an ease of my exceptionally anxious and overthinking brain. For a long time, I always worried that I wasn’t ‘normal’ and that surely no-one else could spend their time doing the things that I was doing because who would want to feel like that has been such a big deal. It all started at the end of 2014 into 2015 when I was referred to the chronic pain clinic to get help dealing with my chronic bowel illness and from there I was referred to intense therapy and finally diagnosed with severe OCD (order & symmetry and intrusive thoughts). Whilst getting a diagnosis didn’t change how I felt it gave me the stepping stones I needed to understand my mind and my actions more than I did. It’s taken close to five years to even get a small grasp on my mental health but now I’m so aware of the triggers and how I can somewhat manage them as well as not being so angry with myself for not doing what I believe everyone else is doing.
I reconnected with someone from my past and now we’re getting married
When an e-mail from someone I used to date fell into my inbox I didn’t quite know what to expect, I certainly didn’t think nearly seven years on that we would be engaged and getting married next year. We dated a couple of times when we were younger but the timing was never right for us to be together, in this instance it turns out that good things do really come to those who wait and trusting the timing in your life can lead to great things. Our relationship has changed an incredible amount in the past few years, we did long distance for a long time whilst he was a touring musician and whilst that was so amazing to be able to support him through. It was undeniably hard on the dynamic of our relationship, there were points where I didn’t know if I could carry on anymore but I’m so, so glad we pulled through as we wouldn’t be us without those touring years behind us. The adjustment of going from tour life to ‘regular’ life is something that has certainly been challenging in the past couple of years since we moved in together but I feel like we’ve finally found our groove and right now we’re happier than we’ve ever been.
i started working for myself
After being diagnosed with a chronic illness in 2013 that I’d been struggling with since university I felt like my life was over, I had no idea how I was going to hold down and function in a traditional workspace. This is why I started to work for myself and until this day I still do, it’s not been easy at all and I don’t have a super inspiring business story behind me but that’s ok. Despite my business not being born out of a positive situation, it’s something that I’m so incredibly grateful I’m able to do now and proud of myself for managing to sustain even when things felt like they were impossible. Being able to bring in an income and be able to manage my health is such a privilege, not something I take for granted at all which is why I’m so grateful for anybody who takes the time to support me online, it doesn’t go unnoticed and I'll be forever thankful for what the internet has provided for me.
I got two dogs
Apart from getting engaged to the (human) love of my life undoubtedly the best thing that has happened to me in the past 10 years has been welcoming Josie and Edie into my life. If you’ve never read this blog before then you might not know who they are but Josie is a black whippet cross who is almost three and Edie is a little blue whippet who will be two soon. Getting a dog of my own has taught me so much and it’s also been something that has helped me so much mentally. The dark days are no longer as dark with them around and they give me no choice but to get up and take them outside which is not only integral for their happiness but mine too. For so long I worried that I would so useless at taking care of anything but myself but getting Josie and Edie taught me that actually, I’m way more capable than I give myself credit for and I’m pretty proud of the life that I give them.
i grieved my mum’s death
When my mum died in 2009 I truly thought that I wasn’t going to be able to carry on without her and I had no idea how I was going to cope with her death. Whilst we didn’t always have the greatest relationship and at times it was incredibly strained she was still my best friend and the older I got the closer we became and going through my twenties without her has been so hard. We found out in January 2009 that she had cancer and then in August she passed away, we thought we were going to get longer with her but sadly, we didn’t and despite knowing that it was coming it was exceptionally difficult to accept and handle. Grief is something that is so personal to each and every one of us, there is no right or wrong way to do it and it’s not something that is linear at all. Sometimes you’ll feel ok and then you’ll see something that reminds you of that person and you’ll feel like you’re back at square one once again. 10 years on things I certainly still miss her but I do feel like I’ve finally been able to make peace with her death and that is not something I ever thought I was going to achieve.
